Colored by Booze

"I'm so tired of being lonely
I still have some love to give
Won't you show me that you really care?"
- Traveling Wilburys - Handle With Care

"LOL No"
- Me

Incident the First:

EXT - NIGHT - OUTSIDE SWANSTON ST MCDONALDS
TOM, NAT and her friends ADAM and SAM are quoting internet memes rather audibly as they walk towards the HI-FI BAR. NAT sees another group of friends and stops to say hello. TOM begins to agitate GOOFY HAIR BLOKE.

GOOFY HAIR BLOKE
Hey guys.

NAT
Hey, hows it going!

ADAM
YOU CAN FUCK MY WIFE!

TOM
(to GHB)
What are you looking at and shit?

GHB:
(startled)
What?

TOM:
You heard me. Stop looking at me and shit, I'm just walking here and having a good time and shit and you keep looking at me. What kind of poofter shit is this?

ALL:
LOL

GHB and company walk away.

TOM:
Fuckin' oath you keep walking.

Incident the Second:

EXT - NIGHT - CNR SWANSTON AND COLLINS STS
Proceeding from the McDonalds, the group continue their journey unabated. TOM spots a COUPLE making out.

TOM
(sarcastic)
Why don't you get a room and shit?

GIRL
(disengages from boyfriend)
laughs hysterically

ALL
LOL

Berserkerfox performed brilliantly again last night. If they aren't signed on the merits of their performances alone, then the recording industry can just piss off. I sincerely hope Rock Hard Entertainment's new show gets off the ground. Andrew and Sarah are cool guys and doesn't afraid of anything

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Cease and Desist

Subject: Cease and Desist
To: Trivium (who are we kidding, just Matt Heafy)
From: Iron Maiden Holdings, LLC.

The partnership and board and band members of Iron Maiden Holdings, LLC wish to inform Matthew to cease and desist from all performances, both public and private, of Iron Maiden's FUCKING SIGNATURE TUNE, Iron Maiden. We would also like to take this opportunity to remind Mr. Heafy that his phonological resemblance to James Hetfield does not make him Mr. Hetfield himself, therefore making any claims to legitimately perform the aforementioned song forfeit. Very, VERY forfeit.

P.S: When you get a chance, please tell Killswitch Engage to stop covering Holy Diver. They literally made Ronnie James Dio cry.

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Somnorexia

Somnorexia is defined by the good folks at TIME Magazine as "the voluntary deprivation of sleep" to work, talk to people online in other countries (in my case, the coolest bitch ichiban - everyone else can GTFO) or play shitty games. However, as my mask of sanity recedes into the night and the morning beckons me to toil, my mind plays tricks on me; from the moment I rise to about lunchtime I repeat words in my head with semi-regularity and start to remember times long forgotten. I sometimes even start to miss people. What's with that? I mean, for a guy that merely feels fear and the absence thereof, you really gotta start to wonder. That's about as deep as I go. No, really.

Also: you start to feel heaps less cooler when your own mother has to remind you that you have one more week of uni holidays.

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