In Defence of Capitalism

First Strike:
Boss: "I hate darning clothes."
Me: "So would I, if I lived in the nineteenth century."
B: "Why, what do you do with your clothes when they get torn?"
Me: "I buy new ones? Mass production for the win!"

Secondary Effects:
Nat: "When guys buy me drinks, they expect something in return."
Me: "I say you should welcome them to poon capitalism. They expect poon socialism but that's just not happening. Not now, not ever."

Oh, and my theory on the correlation between the quality of Celtic style music and the distance between the place of production and Ireland has been validated once again by the haunting, yet exquisitely crafted Slania by SWISS metallers Eluveitie.

My Old Shows #1 - Split Infinities

When I was younger, I had many ideas for shitty shows. Here is the first in a line of shows that I present to you, the blogtastic public. Please don't say it sounds like "Sliding Doors" or I will cut you, cut you good.

Title: Split Infinities
Status: Treatment stage
Completion: Probably never
Synopsis:


Imagine if you made a decision that affected the rest of your life? What about one that affected the next half an hour? Split Infinities explores the funny and remarkable side of everyday decisions – do I go to work or stay at home? Go to a wild party or a quiet night at the pub? Take your mother’s or girlfriend’s side in a family argument?

Endless possibilities are thrown up and played out by hapless and mostly cynical university graduate, David, who is earning a PhD in a field his tutors think is preposterous (but haven’t the heart to tell him) that makes his decision based on an issue, problem or simple daily choice. Set in a suburban town adjacent to a cosmopolitan city, it will explore modern, young people in an increasingly twisted and sarcastic world of their own creation. Typically, two scenarios will be presented in each episode and will look at how his decision affects his world around him. Alternate history plays a large part in Split Infinities, as observational and incisive references to popular culture and world events are also presented in a “what if” fashion in an alternate timeline. The narrative will be non-linear, showing the immediate ending first and replaying his original decisions’ timeline contrasted with a different scenario. The truth of the matter is that sometimes there just is no right decision.

Main supporting characters will be drawn from his eccentric friends including a headstrong ex-girlfriend that moves on in word but not quite in deed, his best school chum with a delicate handle on reality and Tom, a vagabond scriptwriter will play as a slightly exaggerated caricature of the writer of this show, to add realism and to break the fourth wall in a quirky fashion.

An Open Letter to The United States of America

Dear President Bush, "Shadow" President Cheney, Members of the House, Senators, the General Electric Company, the seven million people who work at Starbucks (probably);

After viewing your "adaptation" of our beloved and multi-award winning reflection on the very unique - quite frankly, inimitable - Australian bogan culture Kath and Kim, the people of Australia would like to issue this response.


EVER
AGAIN